The King The King
The Characters Repressed and tongue-tied hero of this award season’s darling The King’s Speech, King George VI (a brilliant Colin Firth) begins life as... The King

The Characters

Repressed and tongue-tied hero of this award season’s darling The King’s Speech, King George VI (a brilliant Colin Firth) begins life as Bertie, second son to King George V. Suffering a lifelong speech impediment, he prefers to stay out of the public eye. But when his father passes and older brother Edward (Guy Pearce) is scandalously abdicated, Bertie finds himself with the crown.

The Verdict

Poor Bertie, thrust into the spotlight by accident of birth. While he makes the most of trying circumstances, it’s clear that ruler of an empire is not the best role for a man of his nature. On the other hand, there is an area where he might excel, one that requires minimal interaction with the dreaded public. For coworkers who are judgment-free and a reclusive lifestyle fit for the shyest of violets, dog breeding is an excellent option. Already a dog lover, sharing the Royals’ partiality to Corgis, he is off to a good start. Further advantages come in the way of space – forty-two acres at Buckingham Palace – and cash – the hard-earned tax dollars of his subjects. He need only select a breeding pair from his family’s ample supply (superior bloodlines guaranteed) and voila, a first-rate litter. Imagine the boyish grin spreading across his face as he realizes he need never speak publicly again! Sure, he would not be relieved of human contact entirely – meetings with potential buyers and the occasional dog show are also part of the gig. But in said cases, he could always hide behind the glossy coats of his impeccably groomed brood. Indeed, it is difficult to imagine a better place for a serial stammerer than in the company of squat canines who unconditionally love him.

IDEAL JOB:

Dog Breeder
Horticulturalist
Mime