Working World

I have a very complex working relationship with my boss. Because I’m discreet and good with numbers, he hired me “off the books” to help him with the details of his family finances. The time I put in repays the (no-interest) loan he gave me to kill off my credit cards. I’m a 21st-century indentured servant. I was hired to do mental work, but lately he’s had me doing all sorts of personal chores, even cleaning bathrooms and changing sheets for house guests.

He’s taken to calling me “Doofus” as a nickname, not just on weekends, but at the office, too. The rest of the employees don’t know about the loan or the side job. They’ve been asking why I let him treat me like that. What should I say?

You clearly have an unusual relationship, so you should be able to make it work for you. Say you’ll perform only non-housekeeping chores, or else the rate for cleaning is [double, triple, quadruple?] your usual hourly payback. The multiplier should discourage those requests.

As for the “Doofus,” tell him it’s simply not okay to make fun of you in that way, and that it’s costing both you and him the respect of your colleagues. Ask him to call you by your given name at all times. If he says he means it affectionately, tell him other employees have asked if the relationship is “more personal” than just employer-employee. In fact, it is, though not in the ways he’ll be afraid they mean. He’ll stop.